I cant speak for all parents but I would love to believe we all want our kids to be successful. So when I found this article I just had to share; here are four little steps Neuroscience states highly successful kids are taught by their parents.

1. Write down an extremely specific goal.

Say your child wants to get better grades in math.  "Do better in math" sounds great, but what does it mean in real-world terms? Nothing; it's just a wish.

"Get an A in calculus this semester" is a specific, measurable, objective goal. Not only does she know what she wants to accomplish, setting a goal that way also allows her to create a process more or less guaranteed to get her there.

An example for adults: "Grow our revenue" sounds great, but is also meaningless. "Land five new $5,000 customers a month," on the other hand, allows you to figure out exactly who you're looking for.

And what you need to do to land them.

2. Work backwards to create action commitments.

Now that your kid has set her long-term goal, help her work backwards to create a process designed to achieve that goal.

Break it down into concrete steps. She can set up homework and study schedules, create a plan to tap into online resources, set up weekly tutoring sessions... and then all she has to do is follow her plan.

Then make sure each step includes a timeline -- because the plan needs to be a commitment, not just a plan.

3. Share the goal and action commitments with the right friend.

Sure, she could share her goal and plans with anyone. But as science shows, "The important thing is that you need to care [my italics] about the opinion of who you are telling."

So make sure she shares her goal with someone she admires. Someone she doesn't want to think less of her. Someone she would hate to have to tell, "I haven't actually started." Or, "I didn't get very far." Or, "I gave up." Maybe that's a friend. Or a teacher. Or a relative. Whoever it is, ensure it creates an aspirational form of peer pressure--that by accomplishing her goal, the person she respects will respect her more.

But don't let her stop there.

4. Send weekly progress reports.

Have her list the commitments she achieved that week. And the commitments she didn't achieve that week--and what she will do to make sure she does achieve them in the future.

Accountability buddies work best when they can help hold you to specific tasks, specific steps, and specific actions. That way, you'll focus more on the day-to-day and less on the big picture.

Which is exactly what your child--and you--need, because every great accomplishment is the result of dozens, or even hundreds, of small accomplishments.

 

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