Dear guest that is coming to a wedding here in Buffalo…there are some things that I think you should be aware of.

First of all, we are all really excited that you’re going to be going to the wedding.  But just so we’re all on the same page and to help you avoid some embarrassment, we thought you might want to read this before you go.  There are a few things that a lot of people won’t say to their guests…so I’m going to say them here for them instead…

Let’s start first with the invitations.  When you get that invite, it’s because we want you to come and celebrate our big day.  It’s not because we want to feed you and have you leave.  We planned a lot of stuff and we want you to be a part of it.  Please participate.  Oh…and unless it says +1 on the invite, there isn’t a +1 to be invited.  Please don’t call and ask if you can bring someone.  And definitely don’t call to ask if you can bring a +1 and your entire family.  I’m sorry that kids aren’t invited.  We have a budget and we have to stick to it.

There will be a bar available for you.  Please enjoy it.  Loosen up and relax!  Again, we want you to have fun.  But it’s never good to be the drunkest one there.

For the love of God, can we please just stop clinking those glasses?  Why do people want to watch other people kiss that much anyway?  Crazy enough…when a couple is really into one another, they’ll probably kiss.  You don’t have to force them to do it.

Also, if your name isn’t on the list of people giving speeches…that means you don’t get to give a speech.  I know you’re really close with the groom from way back in the day.  But nobody wants to hear a speech about the crazy things you guys did in college.  Please don’t put the bride and groom in the awkward position of having to tell you no.

The Shout Song will be played.  Please don’t complain about it.  It doesn’t matter if you don’t like the Bills or if you’re from somewhere else.  Just get on the floor and yell Hey-ey-ey-ey with everyone else and have fun with it.  It’s a very Buffalo thing to do.  If you choose not to participate, that’s fine…but it’s never a good look to complain about that song in Buffalo.

While we’re talking about DJ stuff…please remember that he or she is not your personal DJ for the night.  If they ask for requests, by all means, request a song.  But remember that they are there to make the bride and groom happy…not you.  And normally what makes them the happiest is to see all their guests on the floor having fun.  They hired that DJ for a reason.  Please let them do their job.  Standing right next to them or on the floor and yelling at the DJ because he didn’t play your song that nobody knows but you love is just a jerk thing to do.  Please don’t be that person.

All that being said, we really hope you have a great time.  Please just remember who this celebration is for and make sure that the things you do are for the benefit of the bride and groom.  There will be Mighty Taco and pizza and wings coming out at 10:00.  Please don’t forget to eat them up!

Sincerely,

Everyone who has ever been to a wedding in Buffalo.

 

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