IT'S SO COLD......

  1. The optometrist is giving away free ice scrapers with eyeglasses
  2. Pickpockets are sticking their hands in strangers pockets to keep them warm
  3. Politicians have their hands in their own pockets
  4. Squirrels in the park are throwing themselves against the electric fence
  5. Dogs are wearing cats
  6. Teenagers aren’t embarrassed by acne, they’re embarrassed by goose pimples
  7. When we milked the cows we got ice cream
  8. I chipped my tooth on my soup
  9. We didn’t clean the house, we just defrosted it
  10. You have to kick a hole in the air just to get outside